Only the likes of loyal2 could bring you something as amazing as the all hottie all stars. I have no game to watch tonight, so I need something to keep me entertained until Friday.
If I were picking the All Stars, it wouldn't be based solely on whether they play for a popular team their stats and grittyness. No, my friends, it would be based on attractiveness and likeability.
In the first of a very very short series, I bring you the American League team...if it were based on looks.
Joe Mauer, Minnesota Twins
Why is Joe an all star hottie? A killer smile and killer sideburns, naturally. Plus he wears lucky number 7. That has to count for something, right? He's too cute to NOT like, honestly.
Chris Davis, Texas Rangers
Chris is what some may call a regulation hottie...at least in that frat boy sort of way. And while his bat may not be as hot as it should be...eh, his looks make up for it enough to get him into the all hottie all star game.
Brian Roberts, Baltimore Orioles
Probably not the sweetest looking of males, but he's got enough there to make me happy. And really, it came down to him and Placido Polanco (not really). Unlike other male specimens, Roberts has that down to earth obtainable look to him.
Alex represents the Royals, and not because every team is guaranteed to be included. Though I don't go for the so much muscle you could choke a horse sorts of guys, Alex does have lots of tickets to the gun show and he's giving them away like they're hotcakes. BAM!
Okay, so there's not a whole lot of choice at shortstop the more teams you get represented. There's a shortage of good shortstops in general, and this goes double for good looking shortstops. He was more or less a begrudging bone toss because I refuse to recognize Derek Jeter as even okay looking. He's just not my cup of tea, sorry to say.
Grady's Ladies got it right, he's quite easy on the eyes which is why he made it onto the all hottie all star team.
Well, the Yankees had to get in somewhere, so I might as well do it here. He's really not that bad, if it weren't for that whole playing for the evil empire thing.
Jacoby really isn't bad looking but eh...I think Mark Teahen and DDJ look better. Too bad I already burned the Royals card, right?
Ohhh, I don't even need to explain this one.
That concludes the American League All Hottie All Stars! Tune in tomorrow for the National League version :) Happy Home Run Derby!