Thanks for nothing.

The Royals are 41-67 since the birth of my son. And 0-2 in games he has personally attended.

I’ve been married 13 years and outside of one year, the Royals have pretty much been awful every step of the way. Perhaps if all of us had remained single, Herk Robinson, Allard Baird and friends would have somehow made better decisions over the years. Our weddings must have somehow distracted them, obviously.

Now that I think about it, it’s actually more likely the other way around (that in fact the Royals have cursed many marriages that otherwise would have been healthy and long-lasting). The angst and depression that goes along with being a loyal KC fan must have broken up its share of relationships over the years…I don’t know how my family puts up with my moods that are a direct result of this team…

Hey, make sure you bring home one of those heavy Aran-knit sweaters! You can lower your heating bill significantly this winter just by wearing one to bed every night!

when Tiger Woods got married, and everyone blamed his wife. So, yes, what were you thinking?

since I turned in my “Notice of Intent to Vacate.”

I was going to blame my inevitable Olympic distraction, but they lost all four games between me making my move official and the Olympics kicking off, so clearly it’s the psychic stress of me preparing to uproot myself which has destroyed our beloved team.

a certain flake departed for an institute of higher learning.

That doesn’t mean I have to marry her, I hope.

The Royals are just 23-31 since he posted the suggestion that we take this team seriously!

http://www.royalsreview.com/2008/6/23/557587/at-what-point-should-we-ta

than for the Royals to curse your marriage.