How could I keep from doing an offday post once I realized the direct correlation (and therefore causation) between offdays and brazen robberies?  100% of all robberies directly outside my front door have taken place on offdays.  Therefore I plan to fight off my boredom tonight by stalking the streets with my softball bat.

Of course, 100% of all my dominant pitching performances in my slowpitch league have been on offdays too.  That means we can expect around 30 total strikeouts from me on July 16 and 23.

So, what's everyone drinking tonight?