Big Ups to My Subconscious

We all have inner voices, both loud and passive.  The number of those voices depends on the person and the amount that person is willing to admit.  Without going into detail, I would like to thank one of my inner voices.  If I had to classify, I would call this my inner subconscious, on the self-destructive and self-hatred side of the family.

This voice definitely has it’s moments, but it’s usually of the, “yes, another JagerBomb sounds like a great idea”, or “I’m not going to work tomorrow, dammit”.  However, one thing is consistent; I don’t realize that he has had his say, until my decision has already been made and time passes.

The reason I mention this, is because of the recent Royals losing streak.  Never in my life have I been as unmeasurably unaffected by a string of losses as I have been this year over the last week.  I didn’t realize this until just tonight, however, that I have been unmoved by this failure; as my conscious self (an unapologetic Royals fanatic) would never have been smart enough to process the failings of a sports team in an unemotional way.

This is why I give a big ups to my subconscious on the bad side of my brain.  Usually worthless and self-destructive, he has provided a nice subterfuge (likely an inappropriate use of the word, but I like the sound of it) to my usually irrational conscious processing of Royals baseball.

I know we need to make trades.  I know that about 3 weeks ago, we read comments implying that the Royals actually thought they were in the race.  While my irrational conscious self boarded the bandwagon like a parolee to a strip club, my subconscious made a decision of which I wasn’t yet aware.

I wanted the Royals to lose, and I wanted it badly.  I didn’t really realize it until today.  It wasn’t the trades, it wasn’t thinking of the future; in fact, it wasn’t based on any rational reason.  It was my evil part of my subconscious, being matter of fact and decisive while my conscious self was none the wiser.  Just like it tells me that I need Cuervo, trees, Modern Warfare 2 and Boulevard Wheat; it told me in regards to Pods, Bloomy, Jose, Farnsy…….actually, everyone but Zackkkkkkk;

Get rid of them fuckers, no need to process why.  In order to do this, we must first lose.  No need to process why, for it has already been done.

Go Royals!