KANSAS CITY - According to team sources, Eric Hosmer and Alcides Escobar will exchange first names. Both players, along with team officials, believe that the new names will better reflect each player's attributes and personalities.
"Alcides is another name for Hercules," said Manager Ned Yost, "and that's just a better fit with Eric. I mean, Alcides. Alcides Hosmer is the best young hitter in the game!"
After accepting his new name, complete with a new Social Security card, Hosmer addressed reporters.
"Today, I am proud to announce myself as Alcides Hosmer. My strength and heroism are well known. My only regret is that I had to spend all those long years as Eric. Eric is no more. Alcides is here."
Hosmer revealed that he already feels more powerful with his new title.
"Look on my works and despair ye mortals!" he yelled upon leaving the Royal clubhouse.
Escobar was praised by teammates for his willingness to accomodate Hosmer.
"Yea. Well, Eric Escobar definitely works. I'll never have to spell out Alcides again, which is a positive," said Escobar.
"It's sad that I could never really live up to the mythic name of Alcides. I thought my mother would be upset, but she's in awe of Hosmer's majesty and power, so she's really happy."
Dayton Moore noted that this might not be the last name change of Hosmer's career.
"As I understand it, Alcides was the name given to Hercules as a child. That fits for Hosmer at this stage. After his 5th MVP he will reemerge as Hercules Hosmer."