Rick Osentoski-US PRESSWIRE
Wherein Old Man Duggan picks up the metaphorical phone, frantically calling every GM trying to get a bottle of cheap Chianti and a copy of The Vow on Blu-Ray in return for Luke Hochevar before wistfully letting him go.
(Updated Friday, December 7, 7:00 PM)
So Retro got the bright idea to try to simulate the offseason with desperate fools in the SBNation universe such as myself to act as the General Manager for each club. Since he pitched it to the Royals Review mods first, I volunteered to take the helm of these Kansas City Royals, drawing motivation more from guilt over checking out over the offseason while the likes of Clark Fosler, Craig Brown, Jeff Zimmerman, Nick Scott, and Codename: Royals Retro (I won't out you here, fella) attempt to harvest crops in the desert that is the Annual Royals Offseason Death March Toward Never Ending Futility.
None of us are qualified to actually be General Managers of a Major League Baseball team. I am sure I am furthest from qualified of anyone in the entirety of SBNation userdom.
Still, as I make moves as the shadow franchise that y'all hold so dear, I'll head back here and update this post. I'll not be StoryStreaming this because that would imply that what I'm doing has a vitality that it doesn't. Maybe if one of my aforementioned brethren were doing this, you'd look on with longing, wishing that this was the team that would be nearest the dirt come Opening Day. Instead, you will get the opportunity to Tuesday Morning Quarterback the Monday Morning Quarterback.
First things first (after a belabored introduction), I'm operating under the assumption that I've got roughly $75,000,000 with which to craft the roster. If you need refreshing as to the method to Retro's madness, look no further than the Winter Meetings thread.
Rosters picked up as though no moves had been made past the end of the season.
Options/Arbitration
My first order of business was to deal with the options/buyouts and tendering of contract offers to arbitration-eligible players.
- Joakim Soria's option was bought out at the price tag of $750,000.
- Felipe Paulino was offered arbitration and will be due $2,700,000.
- Blake Wood, Brayan Pena, Chris Getz, and Luke Hochevar were non-tendered.
| Player | Position | 2013 Salary | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 |
| Salvador Perez | Catcher | $1.0 | $1.5 | $1.75 | $2.0 | $3.75* | $5.0* | $6.0* |
| Manny Pina | Catcher | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | ||||
| Eric Hosmer | First Base | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | Arb-4 | FA | |
| Johnny Giavotella | Second Base | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Mike Moustakas | Third Base | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Alcides Escobar | Shortstop | $3.0 | $3.0 | $3.0 | $5.25** | $6.5** | FA | |
| Irving Falu | Utility Infield | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Alex Gordon | Left Field | $9.0 | $10.0 | $12.5 | $12.5*** | FA | ||
| Lorenzo Cain | Center Field | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Jeff Francoeur | Right Field | $6.75 | FA | |||||
| Jarrod Dyson | Outfield | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| David Lough | Outfield | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Billy Butler | DH | $8.0 | $8.0 | $12.5**** | ||||
| Bruce Chen | SP | $4.5 | FA | |||||
| Felipe Paulino | SP | $2.7 | Arb-4 | FA | ||||
| Luis Mendoza | SP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Will Smith | SP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Jake Odorizzi | SP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Danny Duffy | SP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Greg Holland | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Kelvin Herrera | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Aaron Crow | RP | $1.0 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Tim Collins | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Nathan Adcock | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Louis Coleman | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Everett Teaford | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Jeremy Jeffress | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Vin Mazzaro | RP | $0.5 | Arb-1 | Arb-2 | Arb-3 | |||
| Noel Arguelles | does not exist | $1.38 | ||||||
| Joakim Soria | buyout | $0.75 | ||||||
| Total | $48.08 | $22.5 | $29.75 | $19.75 | $10.25 | $5.0 | $6.0 |
****Club Option with $1.0M buyout
Honestly, that's more than 25 players, but Duffy and Paulino start the season on the DL. I also am not entirely sure what Crow's 2013 salary will be, as his three-year, $3.0MM Major League contract that he signed when drafted came to its end at the end of the 2012 season. That doesn't much matter though, because...
Trade One
- Aaron Crow to the Milwaukee Brewers for Rickie Weeks.
I believe that his early season BABIP fueled troubles were just random bad luck. The rest of his peripherals do not seem to signify something else, and he was much more like his 2010 and 2011 self in the last 65 games of the season, which saw him triple-slash .280/.360/.488 with a much more characteristic .319 BABIP. He was still worth 1.6 fWAR last season, and perhaps more importantly, he was actually healthy for the second of the past three seasons. With a limited payroll, there isn't much room for error, but Weeks was worth 6.4 and 3.6 fWAR in 2010 and 2011 respectively, and 2011 was over the course of just 118 games. It's a calculated risk, but if there is one thing that the Royals had, it was arms in the bullpen.
Weeks's contract has him earning $10.0MM in 2013, $11.0MM in 2014, and there is a club option to void the contract if Weeks fails to either make 600 plate appearances in 2014 or 1,200 combined in the 2013 and 2014 seasons.
Trade Two
- Mike Moustakas and Tim Collins to the Arizona Diamondbacks for Trevor Bauer and Chris Johnson
- Jeff Francoeur, Yordano Ventura, John Lamb, Mike Montgomery, and Elier Hernandez to the Houston Astros for Bud Norris
- Ryan Dempster signed to three-year, $42.0MM deal with a $2.0MM performance bonus each season that is triggered if he reached 150 IP.
- Jason Adam and Christian Colon to the St. Louis Cardinals for Jake Westbrook and $7.75MM
Tom Gorzelanny signed to a two-year, $6.0MM deal with $500K performance bonuses that kick in each season if he reaches 100 IP
- The Royals sign Blake Wood to a one-year, $507K deal.
- The Royals sign Marc Rzepczynski to a one-year, $763K deal.
- The Royals sign Mitch Maier to a minor-league deal.
- The Royals sign Brandon Inge to a minor-league deal with an player option for Inge to declare himself a free agent if he isn't on the 25-man roster by June 1st.
- The Royals sign Jesus Flores to a minor-league deal.
- The Royals sign Kyle McClellan to a minor-league deal.
- J.C. Sulbaran and Robinson Yambati to the Houston Astros for Wesley Wright



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