Everyone is going to want to discuss Soria today. Understandable. But since we have to wait for the medical reports, let's talk about one of our coaches. We have many "Yostisms," but I'm thinking we need to build a vocabulary---a grammar and syntax, for you postmodern literary types---in relation to our new man of mystery, Dave Eiland. Since pitching is going to make or break this season (given that it appears we may now have some offensive consistency), we need to learn how to understand "Eilandisms." No, I'm not talking about things you might've learned watching Tom Hanks in *Castaway*. Rather, we need to learn the language of Eiland. Let's examine an exhibit from today's KC Star (bolds mine): "His delivery is clean," pitching coach Dave Eiland said. "He’s repeating it, and he’s convicted with every pitch. It spring training, but he’s right where he needs to be. He’s under control, he’s repeating his delivery and he’s focused. What more can you ask for?" What in the hell does he mean by "convicted"? Does this mean your pitch is illegal? Bad? Filthy? Is Holland using PEDs? Does one deserve a citation, a kangaroo court appearance, and/or subservience time (e.g. carrying others bags) for this offense? Does he need to dress in jail house striped pajamas for the team's next bus trip/flight? What are your thoughts on being "convicted" as a pitcher? What other Eilandisms have you observed? - TL