Royals Hope to Repeat Drubbing in Anaheim

The closest thing to a streak that the Angels have gotten to. - Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

What costs $137,271,250 and sucks? Not the Royals.

With the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim in a full-tilt, $137,271,250 shame spiral for the first 38 games of the season, they will turn to off-season acquisition Jason Vargas in an attempt to stymie the visiting Kansas City Royals. The Royals, who had suffered a disastrous week and are mired in a much more impressive 28-year shame spiral, will hand the ball to the indefatigable Jeremy Guthrie, who has been imbued with the immense power of the prophet Joseph Smith since donning the Kansas City colors.

In the first game of this laced-ball death match, the Royals got the better of their hosts, drubbing them without mercy or signs of relenting to the tune of 11 - 3 [correction: 11 - 4 h/t to Kansas City Keith]. To illustrate how rare it is for the Royals to drop an 11-spot on an opponent, this was just the second time the Royals scored double-digit runs this season and their first since the fourth game of the season. The severity of the blow to the collective ego of the Angels will soon be known, but it is safe to say that allowing a mediocre-at-best offense to drop 11 runs on you on your home turf cannot possibly be emboldening.

It is safe to say that if there were a cartoon that were going into production about the Angels' 2013 campaign, it would be starring Baloo, Rebecca, and Kit Cloudkicker.

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