I Learned It By Watching You

by royalsreview on Dec 8, 2007 3:18 PM EST in News

I Learned It By Watching You!!!*

Many here in Kansas City voiced their outrage this week that the Royals have stooped to sign Jose Guillen, a purported user of performance-enhancing drugs, and thus a destroyer of our sacred national pastime -- now brought to you in HD by Levitra, Coors Light and Starbucks -- and a ruiner of thousands of golden-lit father-son moments.

However, if you look closer, you find that Dayton Moore is not to blame, nor even Guillen himself. Rather, the font of evil by Lake Erie is to blame.

Consider the following:

• Jose Guillen played with Alex Escobar for the 2006 Washington Nationals and Alex Escobar played with Rafael Betancourt for the 2003 Cleveland Indians.

• Jose Guillen played with Rick White for the 2000 Tampa Bay Devil Rays and Rick White played with Rafael Betancourt for the 2004 Cleveland Indians.

• Jose Guillen played with Nick Bierbrodt for the 2001 Tampa Bay Devil Rays and Nick Bierbrodt played with Rafael Betancourt for the 2003 Cleveland Indians.

• Jose Guillen played with Scott Sauerbeck for the 1999 Pittsburgh Pirates and Scott Sauerbeck played with Rafael Betancourt for the 2005 Cleveland Indians.

• Jose Guillen played with Mark Little for the 2002 Arizona Diamondbacks and Mark Little played with Rafael Betancourt for the 2004 Cleveland Indians.

• Jose Guillen played with Jason Davis for the 2007 Seattle Mariners and Jason Davis played with Rafael Betancourt for the 2003 Cleveland Indians.

And as you know...

And lets not even mention Paul Byrd. Clearly it is a Game of Shadows buuuaaaa scary!!

* Classic anti-drug PSA. Link here.

1 recs | Comment 10 comments

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Comments

The 3 Degrees

Of out National Innocence. Coincidence? I think not! J'accuse!!

Being a fan is irrational, but what is the alternative?

by philofthenorth on Dec 8, 2007 3:55 PM EST 0 recs

You know, there's even more evidence to had...

if you dig into the stories of these guys he played with:

Alex Escobar was a hugely promising prospect whose career was derailed by injury after injury. The explanation? Steroids.

Nick Bierbrodt was a high round pick who fell totally flat on his face. The explanation? He took steroids before his pro career started.

Scott Sauerbeck is a guy who was once a top lefty reliever, but faded abruptly into LOOGYdom and then uselessness. The explanation? Steroids, of course.

Rick White is a modestly talented relief pitcher who should been retired seven years ago, but was still getting a big league check last for the Mariners. The explanation? Bill Bavasi is really dumb.

"True friends stab you in the front."-Oscar Wilde.

by NHZ on Dec 8, 2007 4:05 PM EST 0 recs

its all there in front of us

by LeoBloom on Dec 8, 2007 4:57 PM EST 0 recs

yes, i hope ESPN picks this up

Hillman, you're on notice.

by FireBell on Dec 9, 2007 8:48 PM EST up 0 recs

so it's all Rafael Betancourt's fault?

It's all making sense now.

Does he know Kevin Bacon?

Success is counted sweetest by those who ne'er succeed. - Emily Dickinson

by buddyball on Dec 8, 2007 10:19 PM EST 0 recs

He Looks Like He

Might have eaten Kevin Bacon.

Being a fan is irrational, but what is the alternative?

by philofthenorth on Dec 9, 2007 12:44 AM EST up 0 recs

The Powder Blues need...Adjusting

In case anyone is interested, I have mocked up (with the help of Photoshop) MY VERSION of the new powder blue uniforms

In my opinion, since the Royals are wearing these jerseys at home with white pants, they should have the NAME OF THE TEAM in white to help make the shirt coordinate with the pants. Plus, the player number should be blue so it doesn't compete with the team name.

As it stands right now, the players number is the one part of the jersey that stands out the most - and that's not right!

by ChrisM70 on Dec 9, 2007 11:48 AM EST 0 recs