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Royals- A's Spring Training Open Thread

The Royals take on Oakland today, with the Son of Floyd toeing the rubber. For news and notes regarding yesterday's action, click here. According to the Star, de la Rosa says he's "OK" after being hit by a line-drive, but that "when it happened, I couldn't feel my fingers."

It's still so early, and no Royal have even pitched more than four innings of low-stress, bizarre lineup baseball yet, but that doesn't mean a hardcore fan can't make...

Completely Meaningless Spring Training Performance Evaluations

Luke Hudson and Gil Meche have paced the front of the Royals Rotation to the front of the pack. Hudson's ERA is a sparkling 3.00, whil Meche currently owns the lowest ERA in the history of Western Civilization. This is what happens when you bring in good character guys. Unlike SOME people, Meche has been humble and has let his performance do the talking. On the inside, the fire burns hot however, making him not only the definition of a winner, but also a passionate lover and a great American.

Because they are mostly untalented robots, professional athletes need clear and distinct roles. If you place them in an unfamiliar situation, they're bumbling fools. Knowing that he'll never suffer the indignity and just plain unnaturalness of pitching the 8th inning, Octavio Dotel has responded with all the certainty of a mother's love. He's been perfecto and should battle Meche for the ERA record all season. I like Jimmy Gobble, but he's 0-1 this spring as a closer. He's weak, he's just mentally weak. It takes a real man to close games, and someone who's a computer nerd wouldn't understand that. Do you know how they selected the Closer in the old days? Ask an uncle, because I can't reprint it here, lets just say measurements we're taken.

Unfortunately, some guys are still being selfish. David Riske doesn't accept his role apparently, considering his ERA is at 9.00. The same can be said for Wayne Franklin, who's posted a ERA above 16. What these guys don't understand is that its not about the name on the back of the jersey, its about the name on the front. So many people don't get that. After Barry Bonds destroyed our national innocence this may not make sense to some of you, but if you come from a good baseball family you certainly will.

We will remember today's A's-Royals came for the rest of our lives.