An Exclusive Interview with Jason Kendell's Bat

I caught up with Jason Kendell's bat ("JKb") the other day, and, although much of what I was told was "off the record", I am able pass along some significant insights to Royals' Review Nation.

The following is a rough transcription of my interview with JKb:


Me:   What's Jason really like?

JKb:  Controlling.  Very controlling.

Me:   What do you mean by that?

JKb:  Dude has unbelievable control over me.   Knows exactly where I am at all times.  Sometimes I get dizzy out there when he starts twirling me around like nobody's business.   Other times, I feel real nice and smooth,  like a baton in the hands of famed Canadian sprinter Ben Johnson.

Me:   Are you sure that's the analogy you want to use?

JKb:   Wha?   Oh, I get it.   Make that FloJo..

Me:    You've been around awhile, haven't you?   Anyway, it seems like Jason is more than willing to take the gloves off.   Has that been your experience?

JKb:  Absolutely.  Sometimes he takes the gloves off and gets in trouble for it.  Not that I've ever seen anything in person.   But it's mostly to show off his finger tatoos.   Jason's a warrior, I can tell you that.     That's what Trey used to call him.   Everyday.  Trey loved Jason.   Started to creep me out after awhile, to be honest.

Me:  Mmmkay....So, do you ever get tired from so many trips to the plate?

JKb:  Nope.  This "getting tired" thing is all about your state of mind.   Just my opinion.

Me:     But does Jason ever rest you?

JKb:   Yes, about once a week, especially for day games after long night games.

Me:    Do you ever complain about that?

JKb:  You better believe it.  But he always says the same thing:  "Everybody needs a day of rest once in a while.  This isn't about your silly macho bullcrap.   It's about the team.   What makes you so special?"

[Long pause in the interview].

JKb:  Makes me mad when he says that, but then I have to admit:  dude has a pretty good point. 


And then the interview ended.

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