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Official Game Thread - Game XXII - The Royals of Kansas City Versus The Tigers of Detroit

MINNEAPOLIS, MN - APRIL 27: Mike Moustakas, both a gentleman and a scholar (Photo by Hannah Foslien/Getty Images)
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - APRIL 27: Mike Moustakas, both a gentleman and a scholar (Photo by Hannah Foslien/Getty Images)
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Having noticed a trend, Jim Leyland has elected to throw middling non-prospect southpaw Duane Below out on the mound on this vernal Monday eve, hoping to seize on the visiting Royals' seeming inability to get to mediocre starters with average stuff. Leyland was said to have chuckled at the likely prospect of Jeff Francoeur making four outs while seeing only four pitches when advising Below to simply throw strikes in spite of the horrid defense behind him as the fates have all but ensured that any ball a Royal hits will find its way into one of his defensively deficient teammates' gloves. The cigarette-smoking man assured his nearly young hurler that miracles and/or magnets would do their trick, a reference that he knew would not fall on deaf ears as the wrong-handed Michigander was, for a brief time in late summer and early autumn of 2003, a Faygo-swilling Juggalo.

When Mike Moustakas heard all this, he set down his leather-bound copy of Fear and Trembling, set his pipe down while uncrossing his legs, furrowed his brow with determination in his eyes, and said, "I know full well that today is not St. Crispin's Day, but that matters not.

This day is call'd the feast of Crispian.
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is named,
And rouse him at the name of Crispian.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say, "To-morrow is Saint Crispian."
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say, "These wounds I had on Crispin's day."
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember with advantages
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words,
Harry the King, Bedford, and Exeter,
Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester,
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England now a-bed
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day."