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Official Game Thread - Game CIV - The Indians of Cleveland Versus The Royals of Kansas City

Comic pitcher.  (Photo by Nick Laham/Getty Images)
Comic pitcher. (Photo by Nick Laham/Getty Images)
Getty Images

After the Royals' dismal performance over the weekend in Seattle, capping a truly disastrous month of mind-numbingly frustrating baseball, they somehow managed to win back-to-back games against the visiting Clevelanders. To give one a sense of perspective, the Royals went from June 29th to August 1st without winning consecutive games. This comes as no surprise to anyone who was unfortunate enough to sit through those 32 days of futility, but at this point it may be fair to say that much of the Kansas City fanbase could and probably should have tuned out on this team.

With a shockingly bad month of baseball behind them, the Royals find them unexpectedly on the brink of completing a home-sweep of the visiting Cleveland Indigenous Persons of North America. With unimaginable embarrassment on the line, Corey Kluber makes his first Major League start this evening for the Racially Insensitives. To ease his pain, the Royals trot out should-have-been-compensatory-draft-pick Bruce Chen, whose dance with lady luck in 2012 has been every bit as unkind as his 2011 and 2010 campaign had been kind.

Prepare yourselves for a bloodbath of Pawnee City Hall Mural proportions.