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Royals Sweep Indians, World Stops Spinning on Its Axis

Lo! Danger Ox! Mandatory Credit: Denny Medley-US PRESSWIRE
Lo! Danger Ox! Mandatory Credit: Denny Medley-US PRESSWIRE

In an ultimately boring game with an atypically fulfilling payoff at the end, the Royals ended up eking out an extra innings win against the divisional rival and in the process completed a three-game sweep with an eleventh-inning two-out Alcides Escobar single off of the doofus closer Chris Perez.

The Royals offense exploded for six runs in the first off of first-time Major League starter Corey Kluber. Alex Gordon led the game off with a home run. Eric Hosmer hit a three-run shot. Those two home runs ended homer-less streaks dating back to June for each player. Even Chris Getz tripled.

A fan of another team would assume that a six-run lead in the first would be safe. Not Royals fans. Bruce Chen and Everett Teaford ceded the six-run lead before the completion of the fifth inning.

Then the game became a stalemate of bullpens. With neither team getting much done against the other's bullpen, the risk seemed extremely possible that the game would never end, but luckily Chris Perez was called upon to try to kill a rally. As we all know, the rally was not killed. The Royals won. Perez walked off the field with his head hung in shame. The Royals broadcast crew took delight, having little else to cling to for team story-lines this season than harping on the months-old antics of a dim rube because the product they've been covering on the field has been a complete and utter disappointment.

But hey, the Royals are only five good weeks away...