Leaked! Dayton Moore's Interview with David Glass

The date is May 28, 2006. Six years into Allard Baird's reign as General Manager of the Kansas City Royals, the Royals are once again struggling, Baird is about to be fired and Dayton Moore will be announced as the new General Manager three days later. Dayton Moore is in David Glass's office interviewing to be the new General Manager.

Thanks to my contacts at the NSA, I was able to obtain a transcript of that interview. Why would the NSA bug David Glass's office? Well, why not? If I had the power, I'd bug David Glass's office as well.

Here now, is a full transcript of that interview.

David Glass: Dayton, thank you for meeting me here. I have heard a lot of good things about your baseball knowledge.

Dayton Moore: That's very kind of you, David. I likewise have also heard a lot of good things about my baseball knowledge.

David Glass: I will jump straight to the point. Why should I hire you as General Manager? I am sick of losing. It is time to win.

Dayton Moore: I will do things the right way. I will cut no corners to succeed, and I will lay a foundation for sustained, long-term winning. Winning is a process, and when The Process is done correctly, it will work. Look at my time with the Braves. All those championships and playoff appearances? They have taught me many valuable lessons.

David Glass: Such as?

Dayton Moore: Well, first of all, the more people on a roster who have played with the Atlanta Braves, the more likely a team is to win. Secondly, The Process, when done patiently, will work.

David Glass: What is this process? Will it work here in Kansas City? Everybody is telling me they know how to turn things around here. Why should I believe you?

Dayton Moore: Those other guys who are talking to you, they haven't been with a winning team like the Atlanta Braves. They also don't have one unified path to victory like I do in The Process.

David Glass: So what is the process?

Dayton Moore: It is many things, and it is one thing. It is doing things the right way, and it is learning when things are done the wrong way. It is getting the best players, and it is succeeding even with the worst players. To be concise, it is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma, and the key to it all is doing things the right way even when done wrongly.

David Glass: What?! That makes no sense.

Dayton Moore: Let me further explain. One of my strengths is finding pitchers. Even when those pitchers aren't worth anything as a starter, I can turn them into valuable bullpen performers. That is an example of doing things the right way even when done wrongly. Another strength is finding players not good enough for other teams and making them key contributors for my team.

David Glass: How could that work? I want to win, and you can't win with other team's rejects.

Dayton Moore: You can't? As a General Manager, I will be good at finding players other teams don't want, and turning them into useful players for my team. In fact, I will be so good at it that other teams will be afraid to release their under-performing players. Imagine that, a team afraid of releasing poorly performing players for fear of how they will do elsewhere. It will be a secret weapon of mine.

David Glass: OK - I don't care about all of that. What I want to know is about winning. I am sick of losing. I want to make the playoffs. It is now the end of May. Can you help me make the playoffs, this year, in 2006?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2007?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2008?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2009?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2010?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2011?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2012?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2013?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2014?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2015?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2016?

Dayton Moore: Yes

David Glass: You're insane. I'm not waiting that long for a winner. I just fired Allard Baird after 6 years, and he actually had one winning year. I'm thinking this interview is about over.

Dayton Moore: Am I insane? Or is everybody else insane and I am the sane one? Remember, as a part of The Process, you have to crawl before you can walk, you have to walk before you can run, and you have to run before you can bunt. I will do things the right way, and a foundation of winning needs to be laid before the playoffs can be reached.

David Glass: Then when can I expect a winning season? Can I have a winning season yet in 2006?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2007?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2008?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2009?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2010?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2011?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2012?

Dayton Moore: No

David Glass: 2013?

Dayton Moore: No, unless we're ahead of schedule.

David Glass: 2014?

Dayton Moore: Perhaps

David Glass: 2015?

Dayton Moore: Yes

David Glass: That's it. This interview is over. Thank you for your time, but I'm not going to wait that long to win. Lots of other General Managers have turned around teams in only a few years. I'm not waiting 10 years just to win, let alone make the playoffs. My secretary will see you out the door.

Dayton Moore: The Process is a 10 - 12 year process that will work, if you just give it enough time. Let me further explain it to you.

David Glass: I said, that's it. You need to get out of here. Hey - what are you doing? Why are you pulling a gold medallion out of your pocket and swinging it on a chain?

Dayton Moore: Look deep into shiny gold, flashing in the light. Repeat after me, "I will trust The Process."

David Glass: Get out of ... of ... get out ... I ...

Dayton Moore: I will trust The Process.

David Glass: I will trust The Process.

Dayton Moore: We will win after 10 years.

David Glass: We will win after 10 years.

Dayton Moore: Congratulations, you are hired as General Manager.

David Glass: Congratulations, you are hired as General Manager.