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Orioles host homer party, don't invite Royals, who lose 8-5

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Like that junior high party you weren't invited to but half-heartedly crashed.

Denny Medley-USA TODAY Sports

How much do you really want to know about this game?

The dinger party started in the third inning and kept rolling as the Royals looked from the outside in. They managed to join the party for a bit in the eighth inning when Mike Moustakas hit a two-run homer, but they were promptly kicked out.

In the third inning, Ryan Flaherty led off with a single. Manny Machado followed with a two-run dinger. In the fourth inning, Steve Pearce singled around a few outs, which was followed by a Jonathan Schoop two-run dinger. Gerardo Parra led off the fourth inning with a single, which Chris Davis followed with a two-run dinger.

I think there's a pattern.

Cueto lasted only five innings while giving up six runs on three home runs. He actually struck out eight guys though. Cueto was both very hittable and kind of unhittable.

Jeremy Guthrie came on in relief of Cueto. Guthrie gave up two solo shots to Pearce and Flaherty across four innings of relief. All eight of the Orioles' runs were scored off home runs.

On the Royals' side of things, they actually started the scoring in the second inning. Kendrys Morales doubled to lead off the inning, after which I'm told Moustakas put down a sacrifice bunt. In the second inning. Morales moved to third, but he would score on a double by Salvador Perez anyway. Perez moved to third on a single by Paulo Orlando, and Omar Infante got an infield hit to bring in Perez. With a great opportunity to score more runs, Infante, who was on first base, pulled a TOOTBLAN (or was it Orlando's fault?) by running past Orlando, who didn't stray far from second base on a long drive to center field from Alcides Escobar. A double play was the ruling. Inning over.

The Royals would not score again until the sixth inning, when the singles train rolling around on the front lawn of the party distracted the Orioles long enough to allow a run. The Royals' final two runs were on the aforementioned Moustakas dinger.

Always knocking on the door, never getting a foothold. Awkwardly hanging out on the outskirts. Making mistakes. That was tonight.