Five reasons Prince Charles is rubbish!

The Royal family has gone up and down in popularity over the years, and while I have great admiration for the Queen Mum, I have never been a fan of her eldest son, Charles, Prince of Wales. Here are five reasons why he is just rubbish.

1. He's a meddler

Prince Charles has interfered with the business of running the government with his "Black Spider memos" to ministers. The Royal family is to remain political neutral, yet we have the son of Queen Elizabeth chiming in with the weight of the crown behind him. Rubbish!

2. Camilla Parker Bowles, Duchess of Cornwall

Obviously she is no Princess Diana, but her rubbishness goes far beyond that. Her Duchess Above Replacement value is abysmally low, even more remarkably since she is technically a replacement! Although her popularity has gone up in the decade since Prince Charles first married her, I refuse to accept her as part of the Royal family!

3. His ears

Good gravy, those ears could hear a vicar rustling in the night from over twenty furlongs!

4. He's not a King

You can look it up! He likes to think he is, but he's no king! Look at this ridiculousness!

5. Everything is rubbish

Prince Charles is rubbish. Mushy peas are rubbish. Lorries are rubbish. Water closets are rubbish. Rubbish is rubbish! Everything is rubbish!