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Bah! Bah! Bah!

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Rubbish!

Carl Court/Getty Images

Here is a list of things that are rubbish!

Clouds

Pencils

Women with hats

Women without hats

The telly

Fish without chips

Chips without fish

The Danes

John Cleese

Kangaroos

The colour purple

Aerosmith (do they call themselves Airsmith in the States, I wonder?)

The metric system

People from the United States that call themselves "Americans". Hello? There is a South America too, you wankers!

Ropes

Oasis the band, not oasis as a respite from miserable conditions

Cocker spaniels

Rhea Perlman

The number twenty-eight

Rhubarb

Glass chandeliers

Polka dots

West Ham

Babies who wear t-shirts with rock bands on them

Oatmeal raisin cookies

BBC One

BBC Two

BBC Four

Blogs that think they're funny when they do stupid April Fool's Day pranks! They're the most rubbish of all. BAH!