The Royals as professional football players

Football season is upon us and Tim Tebow’s foray into baseball got me thinking - if it is so easy to change sports, why couldn’t our Royals transition into professional football?

Sure, many haven’t played the game since they were kids, and many of the Latin players are unfamiliar with the game’s nuances, or even the basic rules of the game. But Tim Tebow has taught us all you need is athleticism and DESIRE to make it in another sport! So let’s assign the Royals to their position on the field. Ready? BREAK!

Quarterback - Alex Gordon

Alex has the best arm among the non-pitchers, shows some good athleticism, and is a heady veteran who could make things happen. Quarterbacks in Kansas City named “Alex” seem to do okay, so Gordo is a good fit here.

Runningback - Paulo Orlando

The Royals have a plethora of speedsters, but I decided to try Orlando at runningback, since he is a bit raw as an athlete, and the biggest among the fast guys. Paulo is also a bit inconsistent at catching things, which would be less of a concern at runningback.

Wide Receivers - Billy Burns and Raul Mondesi

Burns lacks height, but can fly, which the Chiefs have seemed to love in recent years. Mondesi provides a bit more height at 6’1’’, and has great hands, although we will have to remind him you cannot bunt as a receiver.

Tight Ends - Eric Hosmer

He has soft hands, provides a big target and could be a star on the field. And he’s popular enough to host his own reality dating show, as Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce did.

Offensive Line - Salvador Perez, Kendrys Morales, Brooks Pounders, Cheslor Cuthbert, Brian Flynn

Here are the meaty guys on the team. Salvy anchors this line at left tackle, with Morales on the inside.

Defensive Line - Wade Davis, Chris Young, Luke Hochevar

Imagine a 6’10’’ Chris Young swatting down passes! Or a human cyborg attacking the quarterback!

Linebackers - Danny Duffy, Yordano Ventura, Edinson Volquez, Peter Moylan

Duffy seems like he’d be a high motor guy who gets after it. We know Ventura and Volquez are ready to throw down at a moment’s notice. Moylan is Australian, so he seems like a guy that would be tough and familiar with the rough game of Australian Rules Football.

Cornerback - Jarrod Dyson, Alcides Escobar

Dyson seems cocky enough to play the corner position, with the ability to shake off getting beat at times. He lacks size, but Escobar can provide some more height and he has shown his range can be enough to cover speedy receivers.

Safeties - Kelvin Herrera, Lorenzo Cain

I can see Herrera as a hard-hitter. Cain is a ballhawk, although you have to worry about his injury risk at the position.

Kicker - Joakim Soria

Every team needs a kicker to blame for close losses, and Soria seems like a natural fit here.

Punter - Christian Colon

Field position is big in the post-season, and Colon rises to the occasion that time of year.

Special teams - Whit Merrifield

Gritty. Gamer. Ability to play everywhere. That’s Whit Merrifield, special teams stud.

Kick Returner - Terrence Gore

He doesn’t have the height or size to play receiver or corner, but he could be an amazing Dante Hall-type returner out there, provided he doesn’t get absolutely clobbered.

Physically Unable to Perform List - Mike Moustakas

We need a cheerleader.