The Wreck of the Nedmund Fitzgerald

Peter G. Aiken-USA TODAY Sports

The legend lives on from the front office on down

Of the Royals that won a World Series

Those Royals, it seemed, never gave up a lead

When the games of October grew lengthy

The offseason brought Gord seventy-two million bucks more

Though it left Dayton’s wallet half empty

That contract and team were good cause to be steamed

When the luck of October went missing

Greinke was the pride of 2009

Dealt away to some guys in Wisconsin

As baseball trades go it was better than most

Setting Kansas City up to be champions

Some more deals with the Rays and the Reds and the A’s

Carried the Royals to Union Station

But after that parade, when the next year dawned

Could it be regression they’d been feelin’?

The ball in the leather made a tattle-tale sound

As Hos grounded out hard to second

And every man knew, as old Ned Yost did too

‘Twas the devil magic’s bill being reckoned

The team faltered late and the playoffs had to wait

When the wrist of Lorenzo grew painful

When the next spring came it was more of the same

In the face of a sixteen-loss April

When the leadoff man reached, Ned went out to the mound, saying

Ian, you gotta pitch better

When the fourth inning came, the team six runs behind, he said

Ian, it’s time for your shower

The bullpen phoned in that the pickings had grown slim

And Chris Young was nigh unemployable

And later that night, as the baseballs flew out of sight

Came the wreck of the once-mighty Royals

Does anyone know where the Son of God goes

When the runs stretch the innings to hours?

The optimists all swear we’ll contend the next year

If we just find a few more good batters

It might be Soler or it might be Dozier

It may even be Bubba Starling

But all that remains are the thrown-away games

And three more years of Kennedy starting

Hosmer hangs dong, while Escobar swings

At the first pitch he sees every inning

Mike Moustakas creams old Steve Balboni’s dreams

The gnars and bear suits are for Duffy

And with great gusto, LoCain and Gordo

Chase down what the batters will send them

And the Salvy splash goes, as the veterans all know

With the games of October remembered

To a little outbuilding at Kauffman they came

Past the Royals home bullpen in left field

Each fan stood in line till they’d been thirty times

For each year passed between the two trophies

The legend lives on from the front office on down

Of the Royals that won a World Series

That bullpen, it seemed, never gave up the lead

When the games of October grew lengthy

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