It’s been 184 days since the Kansas City Royals last won a baseball game that counts. It will be at least one more until they change this losing course.
With an ignominious opening series against the White Sox in the rearview, the Royals traveled to Detroit hoping that Comerica Park would be the salve for their wounds. It was not. For the third straight game this season, the Royals jumped out to a lead. For the third straight game this season, the Royals blew that lead in impressive fashion.
Today’s lead was just a scant 1-0 lead, provided to them via The Firestarter, Alcides Escobar. Escobar doubled to lead off the third inning. Drew Butera drove him in on a sac fly one pitch after Tigers’ starter Francisco Liriano uncorked a cambio in the dirt to move Escobar to third.
The Tigers tied the game up at 1-1 in the home half of the third. This author could attempt to build suspense, detailing the reader with the sequence of events that led to the tying run coming across the plate, but the Tigers took the lead in a four-run fifth off of Royals starter Jason Hammel and extended it by another run when they got to the Sex-Trafficking Crusader for another run in the seventh.
Given the generally lackluster offense that the Royals feature, it could go without saying (but won’t as the words that follow tell the reader what should have remained unsaid) that these Royals did not mount a fierce comeback from a 6-1 deficit heading into the top of the eighth.
Against the previously winless Tigers and the underwhelming quartet of Francisco Liriano, Joe Jiménez, Daniel Stumpf, and Warwick Saupold—apparently each of those last three are, in fact major-league pitchers—the Royals managed a scant five hits and two walks.
Gone are the days of the Royals playing relevant games, kiddos. Life has no meaning. Hug your loved ones.