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Royals 8, Blue Jays 6: Home Run investigation ongoing

The Dale Sveum era as lead investigator started off well. Sveum located some evidence regarding the mythical "home run" but could not fully replicate his findings.

He fell over.
He fell over.
Tom Szczerbowski

It did not take very long for Jose Bautista to show the Royals the ways of the Blue Jays. Bautista turned on an inside pitch in the first inning and sent a screaming line drive over the left field fence. This was the first piece of evidence that Sveum discovered while searching for the mysterious ways of the "home run". Sveum encountered more evidence when Edwin Encarnacion blasted "home runs" in the 4th and 6th innings. Sveum will be able to process the evidence left behind from those "home runs" as soon as they land.

After being shown the ways of the Blue Jay, Salvador Perez, enterprising fellow that he is, took it upon himself to replicate what he had seen. Not 58 seconds after Bautista hit his "home run" barely over the fence, Perez hung majestic dong farther than Bautista in the top half of the 2nd. Alex Gordon tried to replicate the "home run" in the 4th inning, but his bounced over the foul fence for a ground-rule double instead of flying over the outfield fence for a "home run". Eric Hosmer did score on the play, though.

Pedro Ciriaco and Hosmer in the 5th inning also tried to join in the fun, but the outfield fence foiled their attempts. Runs did score on their hits, though. Billy Butler brought home the 5th run on a single on which the scorer, Norichika Aoki, who did not try to unravel the mysteries of the "home run" and reached by bunting, seemed to score accidentally as he basically fell onto the plate.

On another note, my talented and gorgeous wife (who knows very little about baseball) thinks that the new third base coach, Mike Jirschele, whose last name is giggle-worthy, looks as though he is the human version of the toy army soldiers one might find in Toy Story.

In the 6th and 7th innings, the Royals temporarily abandoned the "home run" investigation for some small ball. A well-placed Alcides Escobar bunt brought Lorenzo Cain to 3rd base, and that was the fatal blow for R.A. Dickey. Having won his first challenge on a beautiful pickoff by James Shields, Yost was afforded another challenge, which he used to challenge a play on which a wayward pitch appeared to bounce through Aoki's legs. The ruling was a hit batsman, which left the bases loaded for Omar Infante, who lined into a double play. No runs. The Royals again loaded the bases in the 7th and came away empty.

The Royals did not quietly into the good night in the 9th, but Butler got thrown out at first base ON A LINE DRIVE TO THE OUTFIELD. Gordon reached base on a single, and Yost pinch ran for Gordon with Jarrod Dyson. Dyson stole second and scored on an error, tying the game. Wade Davis shut down the Jays in the 8th and 9th to keep the game going.

The Royals returned to small ball in the free baseball portion of this evening's investigation. After an Escobar single and a Ciriaco HBP, Aoki sacrificed the runners to 2nd and 3rd. Infante brought the runners home with a single to shallow left field. In the bottom half of the inning, Greg Holland locked down the Jays, and the Royals won.

The bats came alive, and the Jays' bullpen crashed and burned. Take heart, friends. The investigation into the "home run" has only just begun.